Connect the Dots with Fedex

I’ve been fighting a lot with Fedex lately. I’ve been receiving a misfits market box in the mail for years now. Misfits market has a deal with Fedex. FedEx delivers the package. In the entirety of the time I have had the service, I have never had to sign for the package, nor have I ever had to be present to receive the package. Lately the most recent fedex driver tasked with driving my package to my property decided that in his infinite wisdom it was too hot to leave the insulated package equipped with an ice pack if no one was home so instead of leaving it in the yard for a few hours until i arrived, he started taking it back to the distribution warehouse with him and redelivering it friday afternoon, in the excessive heat, after the ice pack had melted and the food had thoroughly spoiled. this led to misfits market having to issue me a weekly refund for nearly all the food and me not having groceries because if you want to eat produce at the local grocery, you really have to pick it a week in advance before you plan to eat it and leave it on the counter to ripen. I started calling every week to see if i could be allowed into my account to write the note myself or get the customer service rep to write a note to leave it in the yard because it has insulated foam and an ice pack in the box and its designed to be left out in the elements while people are at work. Well, i had to do this every week because they refused to reset the password or give me my username for my fedex account and they swore they could not put a permanent note on my account and id have to fight with them on the phone for hours every wednesday. Finally i managed to get ahold of a manager who put a permanent note on my account not to require a signature for any packages and to leave the misfits market box in the yard no matter what the weather. After that…the box started being left in the plastic toybox with baseball sized hail dents in the lid up at the fence. Today, however, i came home to find the lid had been removed but the box was 6 feet away on the ground. I was happy they left it but i got curious why they had taken the lid off the toybox if they werent going to put the box in it. It was not a windy day and the lid would not have removed itself. I peered in the toybox to see what critter may have deterred the fedex man from his plan to put the box in there. Sure enough, there was a juvenile male black widow spider. They carry a lot less venom than the females and are typically only alive a few months anyway. Im not sure if the delivery driver knew what it was or just said, “SPIDER! Hell no!” Either way, the presence of the male black widow was probably definitely why he left the package a full 6 feet from the makeshift mailbox at the fence. Another day of life on the homestead.