Ive come to the conclusion that for me there is a pre-pandemic world and a post-pandemic world. There is no “going back to normal”. I am aware in a way that i wasnt before how quickly rights can be lost in the name of handling an emergency. Im also aware how quickly humans resort to “every man for himself” when the **** hits the fan. One wants to think that they would do the right thing when it comes down to it but fear changes people. Throw in a truckload of misinformation and purposeful bending or omission of truths where authorities take a “the ends justify the means” stance in crisis and up has become down and down sideways.
I was listening to a couple of nurses speak about the changes that were made during the emergency in the name of understaffing that have now been adopted as acceptable forevermore. For example, one nurse responsible for 40 patients during a shift was not acceptable until we had an emergency and then it was. Most companies eventually adopted the viewpoint of, “oh we see you are capable of doing this, thats great! we dont have to hire so many staff now.” 40 has now become an acceptable industry standard for how many patients one nurse can handle by his or herself. No one can be responsible for that many lives at once well. What if two code at the same time? What if patient 3 fell and so patient 24 never got her blood pressure medications because the nurse is trying to keep pt 3 from bleeding out until the ambulance arrives and then patient 24 has a heart attack but nobody notices because patient 16 is running through the hall naked with an iv pole and threatening to hit other patients. The nurse and both CNAs are now occupied trying to get him cleared for a shot of ativan and wrangle the iv pole away from him to protect the other patients and when meds are finally passed to pt 24 upon arrival the nurse finds she is dead. Its too many people because if those people are there in a longterm care or hospital setting they cant care for themselves. That’s why they are there. So there needs to be adequate staff to care for them. But the phrase thrown out now is, “if you cant handle it i will get someone who will.”
Health insurance is now anywhere between $500 a month and $1250 a month depending on your income. I am living very close to my means. I am not wealthy and i make just enough to handle my expenses yearly. My health insurance is $700 a month. And it is mandated by the government that you have it. 15 years ago insurance was 100 or 200 dollars a month. This would have been considered outrageous. But then came marketplace and these prices and now its just considered the norm. No one bucks it. We’re not rioting in the streets over health insurance because those making minimum wage are having the government pay all but 29.95 of their fee and millionaires dont care what it costs. Its just the people making over minimum wage but not enough to put away any that have to pay full price and are hurting deeply for it.
During my grandmother’s or even my mother’s generation there was an expectation that you would live paycheck to paycheck as a minimum wage worker and if you had a degree you could have a house, two cars, a stay at home spouse, and some money in the bank. Now the degree holder lives paycheck to paycheck and worries about having enough to take care of taxes, car maintenance, and dental work. the minimum wage employee must live with extended family where multiple adults in the household pool their monthly wages to cover the expenses on a two bedroom apartment or house so 8+ people can live. I dont know anybody who is making enough income to have a stay at home spouse. Both parents work because they have to. They choose their children eating over seeing them grow up and because they dont have money for expensive daycares they are often watched by under qualified older siblings, neighbors, or friends who have not been fully vetted in the name of budgeting.
I have noticed also that on youtube, on the news, in newspapers…we are no longer super interested in fact checking. We are printing everything and anything whether it is true or not. Knowing this, people trust nothing. People utilize emotion and personal beliefs to choose a side and then become terribly divided and think the other group should go jump in a hole and die. Everything is chaos and misinformation and in the midst of this things lose their value and appreciation.
This rainbow is the same as a rainbow i saw in the spring of 2019. It is happening over the same piece of land and it is the same phenomena to look at. The same conditions are present that created the first one. However, i enjoy it differently. The thought is not, “oh wow! Look at that rainbow! What a miracle from God.” The thought is now, “God still sees fit to send us a miracle once in a while in the midst of all this chaos. I sure hope we dont destroy that too.”
There is a disenchantment with humans that i fear will never leave me. I still enjoy the beauty of rainbows when i see them but it is not without the dreary knowledge that lives in my head. I imagine it is the same for soldiers who see beautiful things but know what a man is capable of towards a stranger on the battlefield, or what their own comrades were capable of in a confusion fueled friendly fire incident and how management handled it after. I imagine it is the same for people who have been persecuted for their appearance or religion and then find themselves in a place of safety. You will enjoy the moment, but you never forget what is possible, and it robs the colors of their vibrance in some way. What was once a RAINBOW is now a rainbow.
WOW. Well said!