Its been such a terrible weekend! The one dog rolled in dead animal. The other dog stuck her face in cactus 4 times this weekend. An 8 foot rat snake took up residence in the juvenile chicken pen and ive been trying to kill it ever since but i cant get it separate enough from the chickens to use the rat shot without getting a chicken. The pet food store wouldnt let me use my coupons cuz my dog food is currently on sale even though the coupons were both better than the sale, so i have to come back within 2 weeks and buy 2 more bags of dog food to use them, assuming their sale is over, but the better question is where i’ll be storing all that extra dog food in a 1 room 384 square foot house, i broke my invisalign retainer right after 5 pm on a friday…called the emergency line and the regular number…nobody ever called me back, im guessing they didnt see it as the level 5 emergency i did but this is literally how i ended up doing Invisalign for a second time because the retainer broke and my teeth moved and they refused to remedy it unless i bought Invisalign full price all over again, used denture repair adhesive to patch it for the weekend and drove to san antonio Monday morning at 8 am to beg them to make me a new one even though i didnt have an appointment because i was supposed to be at the dentist in austin at 11:30 am. Got measured for two replacement retainers, made it to austin with 30 min to spare, hit MT market real quick to pick up asian produce…with 10 minutes to spare, made it back to san antonio to pick up one of the two retainers 45 minutes before closing (i skipped a part where i had a deer run out in front of the car 4 separate times friday night), also skipped a part where i had to eat nothing but soup all weekend so nothing moved the teeth too much before they could measure me for a new retainer…went to 2 different HEBs to get ingredients for soup, and encountered my old stalker who followed me down every aisle in the second HEB so i had to run down the aisles in loops until i’d collected everything i needed to make the soup because if i stopped at all he tried to talk to me. Luckily i knew where all the ingredients were and was able to grab some of them in a fly by as i zoomed down the aisles. Ive driven 325 miles today and san antonio insists upon closing access roads and exits to both 1604 and i10 all at once instead of 1 at a time so its impossible to get anywhere, a car almost backed into me at the gas pump, i witnessed 3 car wrecks today…1 involving a baby and one in austin requiring 20 cop cars and a complete highway shut down in 1 direction so im gonna guess: fatality investigation….i finally have functional retainers again, got teeth cleaned, and got exotic fruit but for real, this weekend Murphy was working overtime, and so was my sanity.
Also, after you get your teeth cleaned at my dentist you always get to pick out a waterloo and the top ripped off without opening the can at all, because consistency.